3/27/09

One Year Old...Tear.

I can’t believe that a year ago today I was sitting at work with a fever and ridiculously uncomfortable only to be thrown into labor with my water breaking at my office. Then after 6 ½ hours of labor to hold my little 9 lb baby. Now he is my little 25 lb baby!! Tear. This year has been one of the best years of my life. I have never felt so much purpose in my life. I can see the love in TJ’s eyes when I walk in the door. His face lights up when he sees me or Tim. He looks for us when we aren’t there. I honestly think he is the best baby ever. He has slept GREAT since we brought him home, he eats GREAT, and he is ALWAYS smiling or laughing. I look back at this year and am absolutely amazed at all God has already promised this little man. He was prophesied over numerous times before he was even born and then multiple times just in his first year.
Now for the monthly update: This month he learned to kiss. He kisses me and Tim all the time. He leans in with his mouth wide open. He’ll even give them without being asked. He loves kissing Lex. Mike and Heather watched him for an evening while I was at Tim’s play. They love each other and have so much fun together. Here they are smoochin’:
He’s learning some sign language and is kind of getting it. I think the big part is I need to remember to make him do it. He is also learning to share. He’ll offer his cracker or spoon full to me or whoever is feeding him. He thinks it’s the greatest thing ever and will start to giggle when you “take” a bite. One of my most favorite things that he does is that when we leave or enter a empty room he waves. Like he sees something that I don’t. Now I ask him where the angel is…and he’ll look around the room and stop and focus on something. He is right on the edge of walking. He actually just doesn’t seem interested. He’ll walk around the furniture, he’ll walk with his walker and he walk while holding on to our hands but doesn’t want to even attempt stepping without holding on to something. He won’t reach. You can guarantee that I will post a blog once he has walked hopefully along with a video. I am actually okay with him not jumping up and walking because I know that is one more thing that makes him less of a baby. I know he’ll do it soon but it’s been wonderful him not walking early.
Here he is this month:
And then the year in review of pictures:
Minutes Old

1 Month Old
2 Months Old

3 Months Old

4 Months Old

5 Months Old

6 Months Old

7 Months Old

8 Months Old

9 Months Old

10 Months Old

11 Months Old

Well that is the last year of our lives with just a few of the good pictures.

We love T.J. and can't imagine our life without him. Thank you to everyone who has prayed for him and us as we transitioned into the new life of being parents.

3/22/09

Kid Free

This weekend it seemed like Tim and I were kid free. Our friend Heather's birthday was on Saturday and they had a party planned to go to Joe T's for dinner with the kids and all and then go out to My Martini's for drinks and sushi...no kids. Well it ended up just being the 4 of us...like old times, pre-kids. We left Joe T's around 7 and had our babysitter meet us at our house. TJ got to play and have fun before he crashed. We met Mike and Heather at My Martini. So much fun. well then after My Martini we decided to go to a place a little more style. We headed over to Sherlock's
Then today we met Nick and Kelly for lunch and a movie...kid free to celebrate her birthday that was this last week. We went to Bravo and then went and saw taken. It was a very good movie but wasn't so good on the headache I gained right before we got there. ugh! it finally went awak about an hour after the movie.

Pictures from Saturday Night:
Mike and the birthday girl..Heather
 
me and Teej at Joe T's

 
here is TJ's favorite..Lex
Me and Tim at My Martini
 
Heather and I at Sherlock's
  
and then for whatever reason we wanted to take a picture with our mouths open

 
and then another for fun

 
me and Tim. me being annoying

 
Us dancing. We don't remember what song we were dancing too. HAHA. Mike? Heather? Do ya'll remember?
 
Final picture for the night. Ready to go home to our baby.

3/4/09

Discipline

Now that TJ is at the age where he is moving and testing his
boundaries I have been doing a little research on how to treat his
behavior. I don't want to hinder him from learning but he also needs to know what he can and can't do. I have never been one to put all my stuff away so he can move and not break anything. He needs to learn what he can and can't touch. And I don't expect people to put their nice things away when we come to their house. Why not learn at home and then be fine elsewhere? I also don't want his behavior to be fine when he is with other people and then HORRIBLE with me. The times I have with him is the memories I'll have of him. I don't know about anyone else but I want to remember my sweet and happy little boy. As I've already noticed in TJ's behavior he tends to be a strong willed child. He is a lot of the time laid back and a very happy baby,  but there are times when he is very stubborn about things. I've been told about a book called "The Strong Willed Child" by Dr. James Dobson and have wanted to read it for some time. I've done a little research on what people have pulled from the book and one of the first things that has been said is "make sure you have one, there is a big difference between strong willed child and weak-willed parent. (click on link to see some signs) Also Dobson makes a point in his book that there is a difference between child irresponsibility and a strong willed child. For example a child knocks something off the table as an accident or just to experiment. This wouldn't necessarily be strong- willed behavior and you can't punish for something he didn't know was wrong. The strong-willed behavior comes into effect when he is told to not do something or has been taught not to do something and then does it.

Here are a few points that I saw helpful:
1. You should not blame yourself for the temperament with which your child was born. She is simply a tough kid to handle, and your task is to match her stride for stride.
2. Your strong-willed child is in greater danger because of his inclination to test the limits and scale the walls. Your utmost diligence and wisdom will be required to deal with him. You simply have to be tougher than he is, but do it without being angry and oppressive.
3. If you fail to understand his lust for power and independence, you can exhaust your resources and bog down in guilt. It will benefit no one.
4. For parents who have just begun, take charge of your baby now, hold tightly to the reins ofauthority, and quickly begin building into her an attitude of respect and obedience. You will need every
ounce of awe you can muster in coming years. Once you have established your right to lead, begin to let go of the reins systematically, year by year.
5. Don't panic, even during the storms of adolescence. They never last forever. The sun will shine again, producing, perhaps, a beautiful rainbow over your spirit. You're going to get through this.
6. A strong-willed child likes to help make decisions. When possible give your child choices. "Would you like to have a chocolate chip cookie or strawberry ice cream?" Give them projects in which they can take charge, like planning the family vacation. A strong-willed child doesn't want to control you; he just wants you to allow him some control.
7. Don't let your child stray too far from you emotionally. Stay in touch. Don't write him off, even when your every impulse is to do just that. He needs you now more than ever before.
8. Give him time to find himself, even if he appears not to be searching.
9. Most importantly, I urge you to hold your children before the Lord in fervent prayer day by day by day. Begin every morning with a prayer for wisdom and guidance.

One thing I have learned from almost a year in disciplining TJ is he doesn't react or obey if I yell at him. At his age he is just scared when I holler at him. BUT when I say his name and talk to him a stern voice he reacts to me and has a better chance of obeying. Another thing I learned this week was that a child's attention span is only as long as their age. For a few examples: TJ (11 months old) will only
pay attention to one thing for under a min, a 4 year old will only focus for 4 minutes and so on. So if TJ is misbehaving or touching something he isn't suppose to I have under a minute to discipline him.
Anything longer than that minute he won't remember even why he is getting in trouble.Tim and I have to really look at how we are disciplining him and make sure that we are both on the same page. If I
always yell at TJ and Tim doesn't do anything or leaves it up to me then that teaches inconsistent behavior . I know that I haven't been doing this very long and my child still misbehaves but I found this information very insightful and thought it would be great to share.

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